English is one
of the most spoken languages in the world and it is the official language in
most countries. English being the global language is also important when it
comes to the technology, trading and business industries, which are important
for countries growth. As our world progresses and become more interconnected to one another, a global language will
be needed.
Singapore, a small country with a small
population, we depend a lot on foreign talents into Singapore. Apart from that,
with the lack of resources in Singapore, we have to seek help from other
countries to improve. Our government will usually send people to other
countries to learn and to gain more sightful experiences so to share with other
Singaporeans. Thus far, with Singapore’s education system, which designed such
that everyone has to learn both English and Mother Tongue in school, it is
helpful when we have such exchange programmes. English can be used as the main
mode of communication.
In addition, with a more globalized world,
there will also be more international students studying in Singapore, through
the education system, it will allow us to communicate well with them. Lastly, I feel that in our globalized world today, it is essential for everyone
to be profound in English as communication is an important key in our life.
Hi Li Ting!
ReplyDeleteIt is a pleasure reading your essay, it is very organized :)
Here are some suggestions for you! Maybe you can consider to include why is English Language important to you on a more personal basis and reiterate your points you mentioned in the conclusion paragraph. Since this is a reflective essay, perhaps you can also include some reflections on how useful English is to your life.
The fluency of the first few sentences in paragraph 2 can be improved. Maybe you can change it to ‘Singapore, a small country with a scarce amount of natural and human resources, depends a lot on other countries for foreign talents and resources.’
Pardon me for any mistakes and hope it helps! :)
Thanks, Li Tiang, for your effort. I appreciate you working with "the other" topic. I just wonder how living in such a globalized environment might impact you directly?
ReplyDeleteThat info is missing here.
Here are a few language issues to consider:
a) As our world progresses and become more interconnected to one another...
>>>
As our world progresses and WE become more interconnected to one another....
b) Singapore, a small country with a small population, we depend ...
>>>
In Singapore, a small country with a small population, we depend...
c) more sightful experiences >>> more insights and experiences
d) Thus far, with Singapore’s education system, which designed such that everyone has to learn both English and Mother Tongue in school, it is helpful when we have such exchange programmes.
>>>
Thus far, Singapore’s education system, which WAS designed such that everyone has to learn both English and Mother Tongue in school, has proven helpful .... How? Why?
e) ...when we have such exchange programmes.
>>>
Such exchange programs aid us in creating such skillful citizens.
f) ...or everyone to be profound in English...
>>> meaning?
I appreciate your hard work!
Hi Li Ting, I absolutely agree with increasing importance of English in this globalised world and I enjoyed reading your post. Correct me if I'm wrong, below are some ways you can improve your post.
ReplyDelete'Singapore, a small country with a small population, we depend a lot on foreign talents into Singapore.' I believe 'we depend' should be changed to 'depends'.
'Thus far, with Singapore’s education system, which designed such that everyone has to learn both English and Mother Tongue in school, it is helpful when we have such exchange programmes. English can be used as the main mode of communication.' Hmm I feel that these sentences should be separated like this:' Singapore's education system is designed for everyone to learn both English and Mother Tongue. This is useful as English can be used for communication during exchange programmes'.
As for the last sentence, I think proficient is the word and not profound.
Thanks, Russell.